10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Fook the floosh droo!
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• I'd rather be good than lucky, I'd rather be lucky than lose...
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.