10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"