10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.