10 Random Poker Quotes

• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• "I could make a crazy call on you..." Sammy Farhah to Chris Moneymaker at the final table when Moneymaker went all in.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers