10 Random Poker Quotes

• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks