10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!