10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• God is kind to the underdog! C.A.A
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "The lucky player is usually the player that knows how much to leave to chance." flintsword
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.