10 Random Poker Quotes

• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• There is less luck involved than a bad player thinks there is, and there more luck involved than a good player will admit there is
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.