10 Random Poker Quotes

• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Sometimes nothing's a pretty cool hand -paul newman-
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "you got to know when to holdem, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run..."
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus