10 Random Poker Quotes

• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• Fold and live to fold again
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.