10 Random Poker Quotes

• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks