10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "I had 2 high." -Sammy Farha
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe