10 Random Poker Quotes

• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• " The commonest mistake in history is underestimating your opponent; happens at the poker table all the time."
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph