10 Random Poker Quotes

• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright