10 Random Poker Quotes

• It's Free To Fold...
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• Welcome to kicker school
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."