10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.