10 Random Poker Quotes

• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---