10 Random Poker Quotes

• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---