10 Random Poker Quotes

• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?