10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• The all-in play works everytime but once.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Concentrate. Don't do anything stupid. Catch some cards. ----Mrs. Cloutier, as TJ heads out to another tournament
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• Fish don't eat Nutz!