10 Random Poker Quotes

• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth