10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• It's Free To Fold...
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• "In low limit hold em' deception plays a less significant role. Either someone is already looking at that hand or will call out of curiousity." ---Lee Jones
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim