10 Random Poker Quotes

• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.