10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"