10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "In low limit hold em' deception plays a less significant role. Either someone is already looking at that hand or will call out of curiousity." ---Lee Jones
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Why not, when some because there are three.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "No river, no fish."
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.