10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."