10 Random Poker Quotes

• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-