10 Random Poker Quotes

• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio