10 Random Poker Quotes

• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• Some people ask "what could they possibly call me with" before making a bet. I don't ask that question. I just make the bet and let them supply the answer. - Action Bob
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.