10 Random Poker Quotes

• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen