10 Random Poker Quotes

• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• "I could make a crazy call on you..." Sammy Farhah to Chris Moneymaker at the final table when Moneymaker went all in.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.