10 Random Poker Quotes

• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• "The lucky player is usually the player that knows how much to leave to chance." flintsword
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.