10 Random Poker Quotes

• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• "I had 2 high." -Sammy Farha
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus