10 Random Poker Quotes

• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• Welcome to kicker school
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.