10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• "Never go broke in an unraised pot" -T.J. Cloutier
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."