10 Random Poker Quotes

• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• "I could make a crazy call on you..." Sammy Farhah to Chris Moneymaker at the final table when Moneymaker went all in.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05