10 Random Poker Quotes

• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "What've you got, Layne?" "You BEAT." Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow. $ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day 2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.