10 Random Poker Quotes

• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• Acey Deucy Never Leucy --Phil Hellmuth
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.