10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Fold and live to fold again
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.