10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "What've you got, Layne?" "You BEAT." Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow. $ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day 2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
• Sucking out won't help you. The only cure for stupidity is losing. -- The BRICK --
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• "I could make a crazy call on you..." Sammy Farhah to Chris Moneymaker at the final table when Moneymaker went all in.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.