10 Random Poker Quotes

• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• "No river, no fish."
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.