10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is for loners.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• Welcome to kicker school
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT