10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the f---kin' rake." - Worm (Rounders, 1998)
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Sucking out won't help you. The only cure for stupidity is losing. -- The BRICK --
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.