10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.