10 Random Poker Quotes

• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• "you got to know when to holdem, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run..."
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.