10 Random Poker Quotes

• Fook the floosh droo!
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Acey Deucy Never Leucy --Phil Hellmuth
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.