10 Random Poker Quotes

• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.