10 Random Poker Quotes

• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.