10 Random Poker Quotes

• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."