10 Random Poker Quotes

• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• im going to 2 out you to death
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery